John Markum

The Questions You Asked… Part 1

  1. Question: “Why doesn’t the church spend all or nearly all of it’s money on missions (local and foreign), providing for those who cannot provide for themselves, etc.?”  Answer: We do spend all of our money on missions. That’s all we do. The church is not a country club that occasionally does benevolence. We are not even a church with a mission. We are a mission with a church. Our primary command is to make disciples. So whether it’s paying full time staff to do the work of ministry, sending a missionary overseas, or building an orphanage in the Ukraine (all of which we’ve done recently) everything about how we spend God’s money is part of making a missional impact. It’s just not all for social justice causes.
  2. Question: “Is it ok to have sex before marriage?” Answer: No. But that isn’t a good enough answer. The real question you’re probably wondering is “Why does God not want us to have sex before marriage?”  The best, shortest answer I can give is because of the safety and security that marriage provides. Sex is too good and beautiful not to be protected. Because of that, God already knew that sex outside of marriage ruins good relationships, or prolongs bad ones.
  3. Questions: “Why does God cause so many hard roads in life?” Answer: First of all, I’m not sure that God deserves all of the credit for the hard roads in your life. But at the least He’s allowed you to go through the difficult circumstances you’ve endured. We need to remember that God never gives us a test to try to fail us, but to promote us to something better. I don’t know your story, but I know that God uses everything He puts into our lives. God doesn’t even waste pain. Circle yourself with people who will encourage you through these difficulties. We’re the church. We’re in this together.
  4. Question: “If Bigfoot exists, then what is he, like the aftermath of a failed gorilla?!?” Answer: “IF” being the operating word here. And by “failed gorilla” I simply have to say no. That implies that either God failed at something He made, or that science has attempted to create life, with some resemblance of success. IF he exists, God created it, and there could be dozens of exciting explanations. None of which, regrettably, I’ll entertain at this time.
  5. Question: “Is it possible to become apostate?” Answer: Most people who use this language of “apostate” or “reprobate” in a theological sense are referring to Romans 1 where it gives a laundry list of immorality and says that God “gave them up” to an unclean mind. But if you read less than 10 verses into chapter 2 you realize that God was not talking about specific individuals, but all of us. There will one day be a collective falling away from truth and morality on a global scale. But individually, God never forsakes those who are of His family. Period.
  6. Question: “Is gay pride a sin? Or just being gay a sin?” Answer: According to Genesis, Exodus, Matthew, and Romans, homosexuality is sin. I reject the the idea that homosexuality is genetic for a variety of reasons: 1) There’s been no scientific proof. 2) Too many heterosexuals have turned homosexual. 3) Too many homosexuals have turned heterosexual. 4) I have had good friendships with many, many homosexual people. Without exception, they have all had other blatantly obvious relational issues that easily explain their orientation. Truthfully, I hurt for these people. Not because of the lack of acceptance they get, but because of how our culture has told them they are normal to feel the way they do, causing them to repress the real reasons for their orientation. Most of them have counseling issues starting with their childhood. God loves homosexuals and wants to see them come to a relationship with him through Jesus Christ. Yes, it is sin. Yes, God loves them anyway. Just like He loves me.
  7. Question: “Balaam blessed the nation of Israel 3 times when his king commanded him to curse them. So why is he seen as a bad guy in the New Testament?” Answer: If you read Numbers 22, you get the idea that Balaam continues to ask God for permission to curse Israel, which frustrates God though He told him through a variety of means (not the least of which was his donkey) not to go curse the Israelites. Many believed that Balaam intended to curse Israel, but when he opened his mouth to do so, God caused him to only say blessings.

Church and the subject of “Sex”

“Now concerning the matter you wrote to me; it is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman. But since there is so much sexual immorality,  every man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.” I Corinthians 7:1-2

Earlier today, I taught a group of about 30 single adults on the subject of sex. I make it a point of taking an entire lesson to deal with this subject, with this group, at least yearly. Truthfully, it isn’t talked about nearly enough in most churches.

In a culture that is so bent on the topic of sex in soap operas, sitcoms, commercials, billboards, music (yes, including country), movies, netflix, and the internet, the Church so often is silent on the subject. If it ever does come up, it’s in a youth Sunday school class, where the bottom line is simply “DON’T!” I grew up out of well meaning churches like this. And looking back, the best reason given to me as a teenager to wait til marriage for the privilege of sex was to avoid STD’s.

But is that really it?!? Is that God’s motivation for telling over-hormonally-charged teens and single adults to not engage in sex outside of marriage? Is there nothing else? Couldn’t protection and being “careful” who you sleep around with keep you out that kind of trouble? If so, isn’t God kind of… out-dated, when it comes to sex and relationships?

First of all, yes, God does actually warn about STD’s… seriously, check it out here. But there’s much more. God created sex (Genesis 2:21-25). We, humans, didn’t just discover it one day, to the complete shock and amazement of our Creator. The way some Christians approach the subject, you would think that sex was invented by Hugh Hefner.

Sex is a gift from God that is too beautiful and vulnerable to be fully appreciated outside of the safety of a committed relationship… marriage. And don’t tell me you’re in a committed relationship if you’re single. The only real commitment that a dating couple has to each other is “I’m not going to date anyone else… for now.” Commitment is more than a feeling. It is an action. If you say you are committed to someone, prove it. Marry them! In nearly every incident of premarital sex that has crossed my path I’ve made one of two observations:

Sex before marriage:

  1. Ruins good relationships, or
  2. Prolongs bad relationships.

Additionally, the more a person sleeps around outside of marriage, the more they tend to have a diminished view of their self worth and the more likely they tend to be in making more poor choices regarding their sex life. And in the couples I’ve counseled who have slept together before marriage and ended up getting married still, nearly every couple wishes they had waited.

I know, I know… that sounds hard. But nothing worthwhile is ever easy. And a happy, healthy, long-lasting marriage might be the most worthwhile thing in the world, humanly speaking. So certainly it might require the patience to wait for one of the greatest privileges that come with the safety of marriage. It might be old-fashioned. But even your great-grandparents got some thing right.

God is not a cosmic kill-joy. He simply places a high value on the privilege of sex. I’ve never met a married couple who waited, who told me “I wish we had not waited.” But I know many, many people who would say, “I wish I had.” Don’t be one of them. Make your love life count. You won’t regret it.

Blessings,

John

“Come to The Awakening!”

We wanted to share the following video with all of the friends of our Saturday night worship experience, The Awakening. We’re asking all of you to watch the video, and pass it on. Even invite someone to come to church this Saturday with you. We are encouraging all of you who are close enough to attend, to see for yourself what The Awakening is all about. We understand that many people have their own hang-ups to coming to church. Maybe you did go to church at one point and you’ve stopped. Maybe someone in a church hurt you. Maybe life has simply been painful and you feel like God wouldn’t want you anyway.

Whatever your story is, we have a place for you at Edgewood on Saturday nights. Come as you are – hurts, successes, failures, baggage, doubts, insecurities, hopes, and dreams – and find that you’re not alone, and we’re all in this thing called “life” together. It doesn’t matter if you’ve struggled with addictions, had an abortion, grew up in church, or have been running from God. This is a place of hope and healing. This is a place to start again. This is a place to belong.

We hope to see you this week!

John

 

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