Loving the people you Lead

In leadership, it’s easy for us to get into ruts of just expecting people to do what they do. This is especially true in church leadership. Our entire enterprise is built on the willful volunteering of people’s time, energy, and resources to advance our sacred mission. And important as that mission is, we leverage nothing over the majority of the people we lead. Most of them could drop what they’re doing right now and walk away, and there would be absolutely nothing we could do to stop them!
But despite this, we can still get into some nasty habits of demanding from our people, lay leaders, and volunteers in such a way that is anything but loving. Why would anyone want to be a part of our team on a volunteer basis if it is not an environment full of gratitude and ultimately love for those who give so much to make it happen?!
Jesus said, “By your love for one another will the world know that you are my disciples.” (John 13:35). Yet, like anyone who gets close to us, it can be easy to take our brothers and sisters for granted and fail to show love towards them. Here are five questions we should consistently ask ourselves about our level of love for those who serve with us:

  1. Do I love my people, or do I love what they do for me? This becomes a question of motive. When we ask this question we remind ourselves that Jesus loves the people we lead, and we should also – not just for what they do in our time, but because God has placed them under our stewardship, and as such expects us to love them as He does.
  2. Am I leading them, or bossing them around? This becomes a question of how we lead. Our team needs to see us pushing with them, not simply demanding they work for us, but getting in the trenches and seeing us working with them. A leader always brings two things to the table: energy and clarity. When we serve with our people, we give energy just by joining them. But we also give clarity by actually modeling what we want them to do for us. Both of these benefits demonstrate to our team that they matter to us.
  3. Do I give credit away, or take it for myself? Hoarding credit is a sure way to make people want to leave our team! Loving leaders are humble. They give away praise, and take responsibility for areas needing improvement. People love serving a leader who lavishes praise when them team wins.
  4. Do I correct them privately, or call them out publicly? None of us like getting called out in front of our peers. On my team, we often say that we “praise publicly and criticize privately.” When we bring them in close to correct behaviors and attitudes, we demonstrate that we care about the way the feel, and don’t ever intend to humiliate them when they’re needing correction and growing opportunities.
  5. Have I dealt with critical flaws, or tried ignoring them? On the flip side of question 4, leaders can often be tempted to simply ignore the problems they see in their team. We lie to ourselves when we think this is loving them. Proverbs 27:6 says, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” In other words, a true friend will give painful news when it’s needed, but an enemy will just tell us what we want to hear. Sometimes, we need to have painful conversations with our people so that they can grow. Yes, we must do so with humility and grace. But ignoring problems is really about protecting ourselves from having a tough conversation  – not loving our people towards their full potential.

Ask yourself these 5 questions regularly. If you lead other leaders, encourage them to ask themselves these five questions about their own leadership. Together, let’s be better about loving the people we lead.

What do you think about these questions? Which ones are the most difficult to address in our leadership? What questions would you add? Put them in the comments!

Blessings,
Pastor John

Do you really care?


We live in a time where it’s super easy to feel informed, and simultaneously remain completely sedentary with such information. As a result, we’ve come to the false conclusion that by sharing our opinions, we care about a particular issue.

We have confused expressing our opinion, for being active.

For example, if you say you care about homeless veterans, but the closest you’ve come to doing anything about it is sharing a meme about how “we” don’t take care of homeless veterans, you in fact, do not care for homeless veterans – You just have an opinion, about how other people, the government, churches, etc. should be caring for homeless veterans.

You don’t actually care just by saying that you care. In reality, it makes little to no difference to you, unless you’re willing to get involved. Any issue only really matters to you to the extent that you’re willing to do something about it. And just saying, sharing, posting something, or criticizing others’ actions is not the same as caring or doing something about it.

James 2 tells us that if we see someone hungry, cold, or just otherwise in need and, “…say to them, ‘Go in peace! Be warmed and filled’ and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use it that?” [emphasis mine]

As my father taught me growing up, A “God bless you!” never fed anyone.

The same goes for sharing our faith as Christ-followers. It isn’t enough for us to post a verse, or a cute pic of something inspirational. We have to go out and tell it. We have to live it – embody the gospel – to the world around us.

The world doesn’t need another Facebook warrior, it needs people willing to actually intervene, spend their time, money, well-being, even their very lives if necessary, to do what is right.

So, care. Do something. Get involved. Go to the needy. Serve the broken. Pour your guts out to make this world a better place. No one cares what you and I think. But they can’t ignore how we serve.

Blessings,
Pastor John

What I don’t pray for…

pray-forIt’s an election year… good times, amiright?! No, of course not. We’re all miserable and wondering how this circus is going to end in November. I’ve got countless people in my life who know Christ as I do, that are praying that this is somehow the end of times, and Jesus is going to come back and remove us all from the scene before all Hell literally breaks loose. But I’m not one of them…

You see, as long as I’ve been a Christ-follower, the most spiritual people I’ve known have looked longingly toward the day our salvation inevitably ends being a matter of faith but at long last a matter of sight. Many of you reading this don’t share that belief, and that’s fine. You don’t have to argue that belief, just for the moment understand that I do, and in various theological flavors all “Christians” do.

Over the years, I’ve never actually said publicly anything in that vein of thought – that I hope Jesus comes soon. I’ve been a pastor for the vast majority of my adulthood, and I’ve never once prayed for Jesus to return. I’ve always been this weird kind of outlier to my more theologically fundamentalist counterparts. But that ship sailed awhile ago.

You see, I can’t do it. I can’t bring myself to ask God to usher the rapture of His church, or the beginning of the worst period of time on earth never before seen. I know prophecy beyond the average seminary grad, and I just can’t pray for that.

Don’t misunderstand me… I believe in His return. I even long for the day that I look upon Him. But when that day does come, if my current disposition holds true in that moment, my overwhelming joy will only be comparable to my gut-wrenching agony at the fate of the world I leave behind.

Most Christians say things or quote parts of Scripture to express their longing for His return. Things like, “Even so come quickly Lord Jesus!” or “maybe today [He’ll return]”. Such thoughts break me. As much as I trust Him to judge this world in righteousness, I know beyond doubt that this will result in eternal separation from Him for so many who have rejected Him. I just can’t ask God for that, though I know one day it will come. It must come.

My prayer is two-fold…

  • “God give us more time… more people know Your Son today than at any other point in history. Please, merciful God of Heaven – stay your return but a little longer while Your servants lift up Jesus across this earth.” and…
  • “God let Your Spirit fall fresh on us again. Bring revival and new life into your church. Send a second pentecost upon my city, our nation, and this world that Your Son died to redeem. Send a tidal wave of your love and grace in ways no one can deny.”

Dearest Christ-follower who’s praying for the end to come, I fear that you know not what spirit you are of. When He does show up, may He find us living, preaching, loving, and desperately compelling our communities to turn to Jesus. That would be a really great “welcome” present. Instead of praying for that return (which you and I have no influence on anyway), why don’t you pray that He send more laborers into His field? The harvest is plentiful but the laborers are few, tired, and lonely. Better yet, why not join in the harvest?

Blessings,
Pastor John