- Saying the first thing we think. The Bible says in Proverbs 10:19, “In a multitude of words, sin is not lacking.” This is especially true when we shoot from the hip with our words. We can be down-right careless in our attempts to be witty, sarcastic, or snarky. We usually look back later regretting some of our quickly spoken lines. Instead of giving in to that impulse to fire back, let’s sit on it, think more clearly, and give a better answer.
- Taking specific people for granted. The people we hurt the most, are always the people closest to us. It’s been said that “familiarity breeds contempt.” But it doesn’t have to be that way. Recognize your instinct to be less patient and more quickly irritable toward the people you should probably be the most grateful for, but seldom show it.
- Justifying our faults. We usually exaggerate the faults in others while minimizing our own. We can make improvement or we can make excuses, but it’s impossible to do both at the same time. You’re human. So what?! Quit pretending to be super human and own your flaws… but don’t settle. Make things right when appropriate and stretch yourself to be a better person.
- Blowing up. In reality, there are precious few things worth getting that angry about. So far, no one has physically attacked my wife, kids, or close friend in over 10 years of raising a family. Someone was suppose to do something and they didn’t? It’s probably not worth name calling or character assassination. Instead of blowing up and losing your cool, try asking non-attacking questions. Ask to find information, not to lash out! You know the difference in how you ask, “Why did you do that?” One way expresses curiosity and concern, the other is an accusation in the form of a question.
- Holding onto bitterness.There are a list of people who have done you wrong. And chances are, many of them have felt wronged by you in some capacity. Life is too painful to hang onto to unnecessary hurts. Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting it to hurt the other person. Forgiving them doesn’t mean you forget what they did and pretend it didn’t happen. That is nowhere in the Bible. Forgiveness acknowledges that you were hurt, but you’re not going to wait to see them pay for it. But we’re the one’s who benefit the most from it. Forgiveness is like setting a prisoner free and finding out that the prisoner was you.
Blessings,
Pastor John