John Markum

Good Grief

Good grief

“Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.
– 1 Thessalonians 4:13

I get weary at nearly every funeral of the counsel people try to give to the family of the deceased. Many well-intentioned friends and relatives quote scriptures about Heaven and say things like “they’re in a better place.” It’s not that these quotes are incorrect, it’s that they are almost universally ill-delivered. I always know it’s grating on the grieving individual when they quietly but consistently respond to each new piece of advice with “I know.”

Translation to the “I know” response? Internally, that person is thinking something like, “Yes, I too have heard, quoted, and memorized every single verse you’re giving me now. I know that I’ll see my Dad/Mom/kid/friend/etc. in Heaven one day, and that right now they are in Jesus’ presence enjoying perfect rest. But I was just having lunch with them a week ago and now they’re gone… I can’t talk to them, laugh with them, or turn to them when I need them anymore. And all of your ‘advice’ feels a lot like you’re telling me to suck it up and get over the fact that my ______ just died and I feel like I’m burying a piece of my soul with them.”

I’ve even heard some suggest that we should not grieve at all for the loss of a loved one because they’re “in God’s hands now” and we’ll see them again.

This may be a revolutionary thought for some, but grief is a good thing.

Jesus grieved at the loss of a friend, Lazarus. Psalm 34 tells us that God is “near to the broken-hearted.” And even the above passage from 1 Thes. encourages us who are in Christ, that “we do not grieve like… those who have no hope.” But we do grieve. And grief is good.

Grief is accepting and acknowledging that we’ve suffered a loss.

It’s giving that loss it’s proper place of honor, and it is also an important piece to the healing process in our own hearts. Not grieving a loved one who’s passed is a lot like getting a serious wound and not treating it – healing is slow, if not unlikely, and infection of the wound is almost guaranteed.

I’ve seen many Christ-followers carry an infected heart because they were taught to “not grieve” and the hurt of losing someone has left them with an aching, wounded soul. They often turn that blame straight to God for taking their loved one instead of properly grieving and leaning on God’s grace for hope and healing.

Grief is also the price we all inevitably pay for love.

Every person you and I love (including ourselves) will one day face death. And the greater the love for that person, the greater the grief. Grieving that person’s loss is acknowledging how loved they were. In an unexpected way, grief is also a sort of celebration that a person was well loved, and greatly missed – even if Heaven is a future hope. It’s healthy to remember that.

So not grieving them is almost like denying that they were loved at all.

There comes a point when we must all move passed the grief, of course – accept a new normal without that loved one in our lives, remember and celebrate the life that we enjoyed with them, live the rest of our days in a way that person would be proud of us, and look expectantly to the day we are all reunited in God’s big family.

Yes, we should encourage people with the promises of God in His word.

But more than anything, a grieving person needs to see us live God’s word out to them in their loss, not just heard quoted at them from a safe distance. Instead of just quoting a verse at them, get close to them. Mourn with them. Be the promise that God gave to those who suffer loss. Be near the broken-hearted. Like Jesus did.

Blessings,
Pastor John

When Being Pruned

pruned“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.” John 15:1, 2

  As a follower of Jesus, what do you do when hardship hits your life? What do you and I do when it feels like God is allowing, maybe even causing, pain to come into your life? There’s a fascinating observation we can make in John 15 where Jesus is comparing Himself to the vine of a grape plant that connects the branches to their source of strength and nutrients: the roots. There are two contrasted groups of people in this passage that Jesus talks about here in these few verses:

  • One group is “in Him” but not bearing fruit – i.e., spiritual fruit. In His illustration this would typically describe a branch that had grown longer than it’s strength could hold up, and thus was being weighed down by the leaves of the branch. And distinctly absent of fruit.
  • The other group of people are the ones “doing all the right things.” They’re faithful. They’re fruitful. They’re doing exactly what they were grown to do.

In the first case the “vinedresser” a.k.a. vintner, prunes the branch that has grown far from the vine (it’s source) and lacks the stability and strong connection to the vine to support it’s own weight. The vintner “takes away” or prunes (Greek: “airo” literally meaning “to lift up,” used to describing pruning) the branch back – cutting off length and leaves so that the branch can stay close to the root and concentrate more of it’s resources into doing what the vintner intended for it: to produce fruit.

God does this to us, when we allow the weight, sin, cares, and values of this world to weigh us down. We end up laying in the dirt. And no grapes grow where the branch touches the ground. We have to be lifted up. Pruned back. And that’s a painful thing. No one likes the pruning. But God’s desire in doing so is not to punish us. But to “lift” us up out of the dirt. God doesn’t rub our nose in our sin and brokenness. He wants to lift us up out of it so that we can grow and bear fruit. But that may require some pruning first.

But what of the second group? The “good” ones? The branches that bear fruit. Oh, well God just uh,… well God prunes those branches too…

Hey don’t get mad at me, that’s what Jesus said! The same Greek word (“airo“) is used to describe the vintner’s treatment of the fruitful branch also. And the motive is spelled out for us: “that it may bear more fruit.” On the surface, we tend to push back on what Jesus just told us here…

“Why would God prune the people who are doing the right things? How is that fair?”

But it’s not a question of fair. It’s a question of fruit. God’s desire for us is that we bear fruit, and then bear more fruit. His intentions for us are good! But sometimes God has to take good from us to give us better. And He gets to be the judge of what “better” looks like.

Maybe you’re not being pruned because you’re doing something wrong, but because you’re doing something right. Maybe you’re suppose to go through this pruning for your continued growth, and not because you’re being corrected.

Many of you who know God can accept what I’m saying, but you still have a frustrating question that is predictable, because we’ve all been there:

So how do I know the difference? How do I know when I’m being pruned because of sin in my life vs. when I’m doing the right things?

Are you ready for the answer..? You can’t. You don’t. Of course, if there’s something obvious that God is showing  you, you might know – but aside from that, there is no way to tell the difference. God treats the two nearly identical, and bot for the same reasons – He loves us and wants His glory and our good in our lives.

And though you can’t often identify the reason God is allowing the pruning into your life, you and I are given the proper response to have from Jesus: “Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch  cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you bear fruit unless you abide in Me.” (John 15:4)

When difficulty hits, when hard times come, when you feel the pruning – regardless of the source or reason – abide in Him. Remain in Christ. Maintain your faith. Draw near to the “Root” where the strength and nutrients are. Don’t leave God and don’t abandon your faith – “For apart from Me, you can do nothing.”

The only thing worse than disappointment with God, is disappointment without God.

Stay strong. Endure the pruning. Allow God’s strength to be made perfect in your weakness. Abide in Him.

Blessings,
Pastor John

Water Baptism

Baptism“Then they that gladly received his word were baptized: and the same day there were added to them about three thousand souls.” – Acts 2:41

Baptism is one of the greatest, simplest, and most meaningful expressions of our faith in Christ. I’ve had the privilege of being a part of many people’s story of coming to faith in Jesus over the years. It seems as if many people who make the initial step of deciding to follow Jesus, tend to immediately put on the brakes when it comes to the first easy demonstration of that decision: getting baptized.

The reasons I’ve heard for why people do not get baptized have ranged from:

  • I got baptized as a baby.
  • I’m embarrassed of being in front of people.
  • I need to get some things straightened up in my life first.
  • I’ll do it later.
  • I don’t see why I have to.

The hard part, in my opinion, is deciding that you will give your life, whatever condition it may be in, to Jesus and receiving the life and salvation that He alone offers. The one thing that the Bible asks us to do upon making that internal decision, is to demonstrate it outwardly via getting baptized. Yet this is where many balk.
The irony to me, is that getting baptized is literally as easy as falling in water. If you’ve ever jumped into a pool, you can get baptized – minus the splash.

So allow me a minute to explain what water baptism is, and why you should get baptized.

  • First of all, baptism is easy. It takes approximately 20 seconds to be baptized. At LifeCity, we don’t make you give an awkward speech. We simply ask you “Have you put your faith and confidence in Jesus Christ?” To which you only need to say yes, if you have. If you haven’t, or don’t understand what that even means,  let’s talk about that first. The word in the Bible for “baptize” is the Greek word “baptizo” which literally means “to dip” or “immerse.” This is why at LifeCity we do not spray people for baptism or pour water over them. There is a Greek word for that, but it has nothing to do with Biblical water baptism. It’s important that we baptize this way, because…
  • Secondly, baptism is a symbol. It does not “save” a person, wash away their sins, or send them to Heaven one day. It is a picture of a relationship that you already have. When a person stands in the water, gets dipped under the water, and then brought back up it is a symbol of Jesus living, dying and being buried (under the ground…), and then rising again from the grave. But it’s also a symbol of ourselves. Baptism says, “I once lived a life outside of Christ. That life is dead and has now been buried. And now I have a new life – a life in Christ!”
  • Baptism is also a choice. Like the decision to ask Jesus to be your Lord and Savior, no one can “make” you get Biblically baptized. At LifeCity, we do not baptize children under the age of 6, and many times not even then if the child doesn’t understand, is scared, or just not ready. If you were baptized as a young child or infant, and placed your faith in Jesus later, we encourage you to get baptized again on your choice. While we celebrate the fact that your family cared enough about your spirituality to baptize you early in life, it’s time that this expression of faith was taken on your terms, not simply your parent’s. We look at getting re-baptized as a fulfillment of what your parents wanted for you in the first place, not as a disrespect toward them. Besides… if you’ve genuinely made the decision to follow Jesus, this is a simple and easy thing that God is asking of you. Why put it off? We find that most people in this situation who are afraid of what their parents will think, are usually surprised to find that their family is mostly supportive of their decision.
  • And finally, baptism is a celebration! This isn’t a somber, boring, religious exercise! It’s a symbol that we’ve been made right with God through Jesus!!! It’s a picture of a new life – an abundant life in Christ. We shout, clap, cheer, hoot, whistle, and generally celebrate what baptism means. People take pictures, video, give hugs, and invite friends and family to come out for the occasion.

We are having our first baptism service at LifeCity Church on Sunday, July 27th, at our 10:30am service! If you have questions about baptism, or want to get baptized on that day, please email us at [email protected]. If you want a picture of what people getting baptized looks like, here’s a video that might bring it all together for you.

Blessings,
Pastor John

The phrase no pain, no gain has been a mantra for athletes and fitness junkies for years. And what they understand about physical pain needs to be broadened to a much more general use in all of our lives. Pain hurts. That's the whole problem. No one enjoys it, and if someone does, we rightfully

The Premium of Pain