John Markum

Category: Living

30 Favorite Memories

Posted on by johnmarkum


This week I reached a milestone: my 30th birthday. As I turn the corner on my 20’s, I couldn’t help but reminisce. Here are 30 of my favorite memories across 30 years of life.

  1. Giving my life to Christ/Getting baptized. Age 7. Grace Baptist Church, Columbus, GA.
  2. Fishing at “The Crappie Hole” with my Dad. Age 11. Ft. Benning, GA.
  3. Hitting my first home run. Age 12. Post Team. Wahiawa, HI.
  4. Preaching my first message (scared to death!). Age 14. Lanakila Baptist Church. Waipahu, HI.
  5. The summer I spent with my cousins in OK. Age 15. Stillwater, OK.
  6. Missions trip to Panama (life-defining!). Age 17. Panama City, Panama.
  7. Arriving at Bible College alone (learning faith). Age 18. Baptist Bible College, Springfield, MO.
  8. Leading 30+ kids to Christ at the Boy’s and Girls Club with my best friend Lucas in one afternoon. Age 19. Springfield, MO.
  9. Becoming a Resident Assistant (I learned a LOT!). Age 20. Springfield, MO.
  10. Seeing Tiffany Pendley for the very first time. Age 21. Leesburg, FL.
  11. My last “first kiss”. Age 21. Madiera Beach, FL.
  12. Taking 2nd place in college-wide preaching tournament/1st place in Duet Acting (wrong career?). Age 22. BBC. Springfield, MO.
  13. Asking Tiffany to marry me. Age 22. Springfield, MO.
  14. Parents’ surprise arrival for my graduation. Age 22. Springfield, MO.
  15. Walking the stage/receiving my degree. Age 22. Springfield, MO.
  16. Watching Tiffany walk down the aisle to me. Age 22. St. Petersburg, FL.
  17. Moving from Missouri to Virginia (Tiff slept the entire way there). Age 22.
  18. Coming home to my wife for the first time. Age 22. Fairfax, VA.
  19. Baby #1: Emilee. Age 23. Fairfax, VA.
  20. My ordination. Age 24. Fairfax, VA.
  21. Financial Hardship (Learned to trust God). Age 25. Springfield, MO.
  22. Baby #2: Kaliana. Age 25. Springfield, MO.
  23. Getting hired at Edgewood. Age 26. Rock Island, IL.
  24. Starting The Awakening, our Saturday night service. Age 27. Rock Island, IL.
  25. Baby #3: Josiah. Age 27. Moline, IL.
  26. Preaching at Lucas’ Youth All-Nighter (LOTS of teens got saved). Age 28. Richmond, IN.
  27. Anniversary trip to California with Tiffany (7 years married). Age 29. Santa Clara, CA.
  28. Missions Trip to help start Audacity Church. Age 29. Wichita, KS.
  29. Baby#4: Elijah. Age 29. Moline, IL.
  30. Being blessed by so many people that God has placed in my life over 30 years.

It’s been amazing. I cant wait to see what God does next.

Blessings,

John

Fathering Daughters

Posted on by johnmarkum

When Tiffany and I started growing our family, God blessed us with two girls before we had our boys, Josiah and Elijah. I had always been the kind of man that looked forward to raising my boys:

  • Throwing the ball in the backyard.
  • Coaching them in baseball or basketball.
  • Going fishing.
  • Watching them begin taking an interest in girls.
  • Explaining later why girls are so mean (kidding! kinda…).

But then we had Emilee… and then Kali. And suddenly I had to begin thinking in terms of Barbie dolls, tea parties, princess dresses, estrogen, and (some day) boys – as in other boys. Boys who will look at my little princesses the same way that I first looked at their mother years earlier. At least I’ll know how to deal with that side of things. I can communicate very effectively to the male specie (“Touch her anywhere, and your loved ones will never find you again.”). But I digress…

I think I’ve always had a good idea of what it meant to be a good Dad to boys. And if we had started out with Josiah and Elijah, I wonder if I would have been as good of a father to my girls as I’m trying to be now. But being blessed with the family God gave me, made me have to think about this sooner. So here are a few things I feel as if God has taught me about being a father to Emilee and Kali, that every man with a little girl should realize:

  1. Girls like to be noticed. Yes, in general all females do. But they start looking for it very young. And it’s different than with boys. Girls want you to watch them dance, show you their new outfits, sing you a song, and on it goes. Boys do need attention too, but I find that they’re looking more for affirmation, whereas girls are looking for admiration.
  2. Girls need gentleness. I’m working on this one. It can be so hard to show this when they get in trouble. Specifically, I’m learning to walk the tight line between being gentle and being soft. I still have to be their parent, which requires rules, discipline, and consistency. But with my girls, I have to manage to show them tenderness even when disciplining. I told Emilee once that when she disobeys it makes me sad. She didn’t even realize I had feelings past happy and angry before that.
  3. She’ll likely marry a man like you. I “date” my daughters for this very reason. Whatever poor young man tries taking my girls out for a date one day is going to have huge shoes to fill. Not because I spoil them, but because I treat them like the young women I know they can be one day. If your daughter uses you as a model for finding a husband, what kind of standards will she have?
  4. I can be myself. My girls get to see the real me. My kids know that I work at a church, that God is my boss, I tell people about Jesus, I like Mountain Dew, video games, guitars, sports, and books, I get in trouble at home for saying “stupid,” and that I am helplessly in love with their Mommy. My girls don’t need me to be more feminine (something I can’t be), they need me to be a better man (something I should be).

Blessings,

John

I would rather…

Posted on by johnmarkum

I have a tendency to be extreme. And I also don’t see that – entirely – as a bad thing. To me, mediocrity is the enemy. Jesus told a church in Revelation that they were “lukewarm” and basically made Him want to throw up because they were neither hot nor cold… like room-temp coffee… or worse, milk! Balance is not always good. Sometimes, balance is an excuse we use for compromising to laziness, fear, and disobedience to God. Because of that…

  • I would rather trust God for big things and endure criticism, than stay in my place of safety and never see God move.
  • I would rather do something now while the opportunity is ready, than talk about it until it no longer matters.
  • I would rather have an uncomfortable conversation with someone, than ignore the problem and hope it doesn’t get worse.
  • I would rather try too hard, than not hard enough.
  • I would rather be misunderstood than ignored.
  • I would rather give everything than give a “token” gift.
  • I would rather be too tired than too comfortable.

I always hate it in baseball or softball when a batter gets strike three watching a pitch. As if they’re afraid of the consequences of taking a rip at it. Yes, there’s a chance you could miss. But you always miss 100% of the pitches you never swing at. Get in the game! Do something significant! Risk too much, not too little! Wouldn’t you rather?

Blessings,

John

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