John Markum

Preacher Mistakes

Preacher Mistakes

Unfortunately, this is a subject that causes a certain amount of regret on my part, as I’m certainly guilty of many of these from time to time. There are statistics out there about the rate of pastors and church leaders who fall out of ministry due to immorality or discouragement. I’m not talking about those mistakes, per se. Rather, what are some of the more root mistakes that lead to pastors and church leaders getting frustrated, fruitless, discouraged, or even disqualified? You may not find this list mentioned by any leadership stats. But the things that make a lot of preachers become a statistic often begin with some of these. And even if you don’t work for a church, these are probably common traps we all have tendencies to step into. Continue reading “Preacher Mistakes”

How I Fell in Love


Exactly 8 years ago this week, I met the woman I would fall in love with at a Christian youth camp. She was working one week there as a counselor, and I was working with a church planter who was connected with this particular camp. When Tiff and I found each other, she was just coming out of a long term relationship. While I had no recent long term relationships to speak of, I had been doing a lot of dating around. I wasn’t dating out of desperation. I was just on a quest: to find a woman I could commit to loving my whole life. Oh yeah… and one that could commit to loving me back.

The moment I met eyes with Tiffany, we both immediately noticed each other. Now, I don’t believe in love at first sight. I believe in infatuation and obsession at first sight. But real love is selfless, and sacrificial. Can’t really have that level of love at one glance. But there was definitely something there.

Our first date, was with a group at John’s Pass in St. Petersburg, FL, her hometown. We all caught a movie that night. Now… It would NOT be justice if I did not take a second to give a shout-out to the indisputably best female wing-man a guy could ever ask for: Shela Roles. There were 6 of us total that night. We got into the nearly-packed movie theater and immediately spotted 4 seats next to each other, and 2 more seats next to each other about 5 rows back. Shela jumps in and immediately suggests that the other 4 of them take the 4 seats and that Tiffany and I take the 2 seats behind them. Oh the movie? Yeah it was very romantic… “28 Days Later.” A British horror movie. Not sure I would recommend it. Unless of course you’re on a first date and want to give a girl a good reason to hold onto your arm for most of the movie. Personally? Worth it! I ended that night with her number and couldn’t wait to call her back.

Our second date was where we really connected. We spent the whole day together. I met her family (who like me more now than they did then), ate at the restaurant where she waited tables, and ended the night with a walk on the beach. We were 2 young adult, Christ-followers, both planning on serving in full time ministry. And we didn’t want to get too physical too soon. So we “decided” we weren’t going to kiss yet. We just got that out in the open so there wouldn’t be any awkwardness. And we did really good… until we got to the beach that night.

On the most beautiful starlit night on the shores of Madeira beach, with a perfect full moon, we stood nose to nose trying really hard not to kiss. At least an hour later, our lips finally met. It was the best first kiss in the world! Fairy tales were written about it afterward. And while we broke our promise to not kiss on our second date, looking back, it’s part of what makes us “us” now.

Almost exactly one year later we would kiss again in St. Petersburg, but this time at the altar in the church she grew up in, by the pastor who was her youth pastor growing up, and the pastor who started a church, who I happened to work for the previous summer when I fell in love.

On Sunday, we celebrate 7 years of marriage. Best 7 years of my life. I can’t wait for 70 more! I love you, Beautiful!

John

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